Friday, October 2, 2009

If this is what dying feels like....

...then I hope they break out the better drugs! I've had (apparently) the flu. Fever the last two nights and aches that are so awful, so painful. It was awful. I never want to feel that again! Seriously, I hope they have some better drugs if the cancer gets more painful!

Once the fever was gone, I got hungry tonight and HAD to have biscuits and gravy...so Brad and I went out to where we went last Saturday with the relatives. Half-way through I had to run to the bathroom. Kind of expected that; I brought the rest home. There were these two old ladies there...one was probably the daughter, and the really old one, the Mom. MAN...I NEVER want to be that old! She had to try like 15 times to get up off her seat, and the daughter, who obviously was out of patience with her, didn't help her, just walked off and left her to do it on her own. They left when we left...in a pretty nice car, so hopefully she was on her way to take Mom back to The Home. What have we accomplished by extending life expectancy THAT long...? (says the granddaughter of a 98 yr old)

But...I am thinking I won't have to worry about that...even "best case scenario" only puts me at 60...and I think that's a pipe dream. Monday is the PET Scan. I don't know how long before I'll get any results; I see the doctor the following Monday.

Finally got notification regarding my AHCCSS....one letter saying I was approved effective Aug 2nd, and a second saying it was stopped as of November 1st. UGH...I am going to have someone else call on this for me Monday...this makes no sense and stresses me out.

1 comment:

Daria said...

Hi Shelli, just started reading your blog. All the best with your PET scan.